Category: Dogs

Posts about the joy of dog-owning

Animal Farm to the Rescue

Animal Farm to the Rescue

My dog watches a lot of TV and has a lot of time to think about it. As a consequence, she subjects me to Stasi-like interrogation about the lower ends of human society and house prices in England, pretty much the only topics that TV companies see fit to render in these enlightened times. And …

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The Dog and the Amazon Dot

The Dog and the Amazon Dot

Alexa arrived in our family this week.  Finally.  After nine months of waiting. :-\ Now that you’ve picked yourself from the floor, I’ll explain. We’re not pushing back the boundaries of biology and haven’t encountered a clutch of faintly glowing eggs in the swimming pool.  And it goes without saying that we haven’t acquired another …

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Sam Allardyce and the Labradors

Sam Allardyce and the Labradors

Normally, I work quite a bit from home.  This is because I have a tolerant employer and I’m quite grumpy.  These two facts mean that my absence from the office for prolonged periods usually slips by without too much fuss or notice.  Indeed, I suspect that the place is all the happier and more pleasant …

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Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra

Darmok and Jalad at Tanagra

I’ve been struck recently by the onset of a condition that I thought would never visit me. It came upon me quite suddenly, just a few weeks ago.  Its symptoms are easy to spot. You’re lying in bed in the morning, planning the rest of your day, when your head suddenly fills with images of …

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Last Turkey in The Shop

Last Turkey in The Shop

Sometimes I think the mutt doesn’t like Doggy Daycare.  In fact, I might actually have heard her refer to it as ‘The Gulag’ and not in a post-modern ironic kind of way. I can usually tell.  The signs are obvious.  I arrive, ring the buzzer and announce myself to Cheryl.  The mutt appears, gives me …

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Dog Poo and Chips

Dog Poo and Chips

Dog poo is a necessary evil for the dog-owner.  Something up with which we all just need to put. Wait. Bag it. Bin it. Simple enough.  Except that we all know that not every dog owner is imbued with an equal degree of civic responsibility.  For every Jimmy Reid there’s a David Chaytor.  Or a …

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Oxytocin

Oxytocin

Mutt: My eyes, my eyes, look into my eyes Me: What? Mutt:  My eyes.  Look into my eyes Me: What the hell are you on about? Mutt:  Oxytocin.  Look into my eyes Me: Have you been sniffing the furniture polish beneath the sink again? Mutt:  No.  Of course not.  Well, yes I have actually, but …

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Walking the Dog

Walking the Dog

My dog can talk.  Not bark or growl or howl or yelp or make snuffling noises – although she can do those too.   But talk.  Like a human.   Well, like an educated, white Caucasian human actually.  And an educated, white Caucasian human that speaks English to boot. This is good because it means that we can discuss the Big …

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